I lost my uncle earlier this year,
and now I can’t make myself to visit my aunt in their home,
because she has his pictures hanging on the walls, because she has his things around their home, because it’s soaked in memories of him.
I know I am selfish but when I visit or see her, it makes me cry. I know her loss is bigger than mine and I should be there to support her.
I can’t, it’s really hard.
I went yesterday evening, and I didn’t want to stay in their house, so I stayed on the porch, and she sat in his chair. I am glad it was already dark, because I had tears running down my face.